Hi Congratulations on the new site it looks really interesting
I was brought up in a very devout household but can honestly say that my younger years were very enjoyable. We were in a close knit community and i remember having many happy times and get togethers
The problem hit when i reached late teens and wanted to spread my wings a little and then they came down on me like a ton of bricks. Even innocent things like going bowling and skating with other congregations was deemed to be leading one astray from the "truth" However I held on by the skin of my teeth leading a bit of a double life and finally met my husband to be at the age of 19. Because my heart was not really in it we did do the terrible sin (well to them ) of sleeping together and i got pregnant . You can imagine what a stir that caused !!! Any way we did get married (small registry office with just parents and 1 friend ....I always regret that) and because we were in different congregations had 2 different judicial comitee meetings . Hey presto , I was DF and hubby didn't ....how do you work that one out !!!
To cut a long story short we stuck at the hard time of keeping going along as i really didn't want to loose my family and was reinstated after my daughter was born
Fast forward 16 years .....had another child a son , stayed in the organisation, did all the right things hubby by this time was an elder. By this time my lovely daughter had reached 16 and a lovely girl . She had been friendly with one of the boys in the cong for about 2 years and was very keen on him. We were pretty fair parents i think but probably a bit laxer than we should have been especially because of my up bringing and i didn't want my children to have a double life and hide things. Bingo ......she got pregnant (like mother like daughter ...) Obviously initially were were upset however fortunately she hadn't got baptised but the other elders felt it was their duty to come and have a meeting with her and us.
Its tolerable going through a judicial meeting for yourself but another thing when you are sat listening to greasy middle aged men questioning your very precious daughter all about her sex life in front of her parents. They started to get so intimate that my husband stood up, told them he was going to deal with it and told them in no uncertain terms to get out of his house. It was as if a veil had been lifted from our eyes and we finally saw what a cult it was and we didn't really have alife to call our own and everyone felt they had ownership over it. Husband resigned the next day from being an elder and withing about 2 months we were no longer going
Fast forward another 11 years we have the most beautiful 11 year old grandaughter , a succesful 28 year old daughter who is very happy, a son at university ans we have never been happier as a married couple . we have been married now nearly 30 years have made some very very special frinds "in the world" .. people who accept us for what we are. We feel no need to have to explain our actions any longer to anyone
All I would say to people is there is life after JW. it takes time but time shows what a controlling cult it really is