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Jeremy - Site Co-creator

 

Hello all,

My name is Jeremy, I am one of the two co-creators of the The Broad Road. It was only the beginning of 2010 that I first came to the conclusion that the Jehovah's Witnesses, and yes even the Bible, were a lie, and I went to my first exJW website (click here to read that portion of my story, I am MiahX at JehovahsWitnessRecovery.com ).

Before all of that, I started out as a devout believer, hanging out with an 80-year old Special Pioneer/Elder and his wife pioneering in South Carolina. Being out in service, I felt compelled to read the Bible front to back if I was going to preaching to others to do the same. All I wanted was to know what the truth is, the whole truth, reality. I didn’t want to go on faith, or beliefs, or hope, I wanted to know. And the facts are not there, it’s charades at best. No wonder there are so many religions, because the Bible is simply not clear, and can be interpreted in many ways. But like so many, the more I read, the more problems I ran into. Questions like:

  • Why would God need to make an entire diverse race of dinosaurs just to ‘ready the Earth’, and then just kill them all as he did? And why were dinosaurs meat-eaters before man sinned, those plates and spikes on their backs and tails weren't for decoration!
  • Why do snakes have fangs and venom, to eat fruit? Lions have fangs, to chew shrubs? And why do animals eat each other, they didn't sin, is that what they would have done in paradise?
  • Why did God tempt Adam and Eve, based on a lie of the Tree of Knowledge, and then allow Satan to go trick them into eating it with a lie…all while they don’t even know the meaning of the word lie? And what was the Tree of Life for, was it too just a lie, or a real food that could give everlasting life?
  • Why would Satan, a perfect being who saw first-hand the awesome power of God, decide to challenge him. What did this genius think would happen next? It makes you think (if the story were true), what really happened, I'd like to hear Satan's side of the story. Why would 1/3rd of the angels follow this nut?
  • Why would Satan pretend to be a snake and lie to Eve knowing that the all-seeing God was watching it happen? And why would God allow it? And how is it fair that Eve was expected to know for sure that God was not the one lying, she had never seen a snake talk or been told a lie.
  • Why did God drown the people of Noah’s day when he was supposedly waiting to intervene to prove Satan wrong?  Why flood the entire planet killing all life on the planet  just to kill a small amount of people in one small location? Why not just turn them off with an instant heart attack or similar, and why kill them in such a scary and painful way?

Then when I had the event with the elders, I left the faith to die at Armageddon believing that God simply did not care since he allowed all of that to happen. After all, why was God allowing his elders who were appointed by Holy Spirit to be the cause of one of his sheep leaving? The meetings are meant to be a 'shelter from the storm'...but there was no roof.

Then in 2009 after going through some other personal issues, I started to question everything again. For me, I didn’t want to read any ‘apostate’ websites or look at any other anti-religious anything. I wanted to figure out the real truth on my own only based solely on proven science and facts.

So we come back to where we started, I joined the first exJW website to make new friends. I was so excited to first peek around the site a little for the first time to be validated that like me, most exJWs had also arrived at the conclusion of Atheism/ Agnosticism. So I posted there for the first time, and I waited. I waited for replies, I waited and participated, waiting for real one-on-one interaction with like-minded exJWS. But it was too slow for me, I wanted it now! So I looked around the site and found events that were planned, and a way to chat with other users. But alas, it required that I wait even longer based on a minimum amount of posts before participating.

So I took matters into my own hands. The first thing I did was start looking for other exJWs that lived near me. I found some, and messaged them asking to talk on the phone and meet. RedMax, SolarCoud, and Meatler were the first exJWs to come to my place for my first little Apostafest. Red and I turned out to both be computer geeks, and we started talking about the fact that exJWs are too spread out, and we need to be able to get them together in a place where they can find others close by easily to make events and chat.

6 months later, we had made the website you see before you. I may have lost my conditional friends and family, but I am making new unconditional ones every day now. I hope it will help others to find friends as good as the ones I have made.

 

The Broad Road

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

And we are very glad that you guys did start this site!

Yay!

Glad to hear that you're moving on, and you're finally discovering the world for what it is.

Thank you for your story, you were dealt a bad hand and looks like you are on a better road.   Smile

Sadly, my parents have completely shunned me now. I wanted to share this last email I sent to them. It didn't help me with my situation, but I think it could help others.

 

 

Dear Mom and Dad,

I waited a while in hopes that you would calm down and think about the whole situation more clearly, but it seems I was mistaken since you told (younger sister) that you never intended  to speak to me again. That’s  a real shame. I think about all the years that have gone by without (older brother) in our family because he really was a piece of shit who wanted nothing to do with the parents who raised him anymore…he has now been alive longer without our family than with it, disgusting. And yet how many times over the years have you tried to reach out to him?

Now contrast that with me, where you are instead trying to disown me simply because I don’t believe what you do any more. Did you really have me knowing that if I rejected the religion that you raised me with that you would simply cast me aside as a failure? You do realize that you raised me, you are partly responsible for the person that I am, and you don’t get the luxury of just walking away from the ‘problem’ when it doesn’t believe what you believe anymore. I know it’s difficult to understand; but I know everything about the ‘truth’ that you do, I’ve weighed the situation more seriously than I will ever get to share with you. And no matter how much you believe that I just don’t want to go to meetings any more, I am proud to be able to defend my stance better than I ever could have done for the ‘truth’.

I’ve had this knowledge long enough that I could have told you much sooner, but I knew what the repercussions might have been. If it was up to me, I would prefer that you and I never had to talk about it at all, I would prefer to leave you with your faith after 40+ years of basing your entire life on it. Mentioning a few things to (younger brother) was a huge mistake, but I can’t take it back. And as for (younger sister), I know it’s hard to swallow, but I didn’t teach her anything. If she felt the same way, would you really expect her to tell you when she sees how you’re treating me?

But I feel you have backed me into a corner; I either have no parents for the rest of my life, or I try to help them understand where I am coming from. I won’t use any science or magic, just the Societies’ literature and the Bible itself.

"No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and family. - Does study of the Bible lead to family breakup? No." - Awake! July 2009 P29

"Would pride or stubbornness prevent you from admitting that you are on the wrong road? Well, then, if you learn from an examination of your Bible that you are traveling a wrong religious road, be willing to change." - You Can Live Forever in Paradise on Earth Page 32

test the inspired expressions to see whether they originate with God. - 1 John 4:1

"Make sure of all things." – 1 Thess. 5: 21

know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” - John 8:32

I know that your biggest hang-up is the ‘you already made your decision when you got baptized’ argument. So let’s really focus in on just that point for this email.

The Watchtower May 15th 2008 article titled “While You Are Young, Choose to Serve Jehovah” (pages 17-21) is a call to the children of Witnesses to get baptized. It starts off with  “You young ones in the Christian congregation, have you made a dedication to Jehovah? Many may find the choice to serve the true God difficult to make.” But yet the Society is against infant baptism because as they say in the 1/15 1989 Watchtower on page 13 “Baptizing an infant is wrong because a baby cannot understand, make a decision, and become a disciple. Those baptized during Philip’s ministry in Samaria were “men and women,” not mere infants. (Acts 8:4-8, 12) Baptism is for those old enough to learn, believe, and exercise faith”. Since baptism is such an important life-changing step, would baptism of young children be much different than infant baptism? Apparently so, as a few examples:

  1. It is not enough simply to believe the Bible truths you have been taught, nor is it enough simply to tag along with your parents to Christian meetings. Those desiring salvation must dedicate themselves to God and do his will.” – Awake 3/22/1990 page 26
  2. For example, the preteen son of an elder sincerely wanted to get baptized. So his father had three other elders discuss with the youngster the questions designed for those contemplating baptism. Their conclusion was that, though quite young, he qualified to be baptized as an ordained minister of Jehovah God. Why, attending the Pioneer Service School in the Bahamas recently was a ten-year-old baptized girl, the daughter of two full-time ministers!” – Watchtower 3/15 1988 Page 14
  3. Watchtower 6/15/1985 page 23 brags about an 11yr old.
  4. Watchtower 11/1/1967 page 644 a 10yr old.
  5. Watchtower 8/1/1995 page 21 another 11 years old.

But where this subject gets really confusing is when comparing the society’s push to get baptized young vs. getting married, it’s a whole different story! The advice is to wait, examples:

  1. 1. the Bible sets no minimum age for marriage. But it does recommend that before marrying, one should be “past the bloom of youth. Why? Because such young people are just in the early stages of developing the emotional maturity, self-control, and spiritual qualities necessary to handle married life.” – Awake 1/22/1998 page 19
  2. Why not honestly examine yourself, your likes and dislikes? Do you not see that your appreciation for life has been enhanced by the passage of time? Did you have the same values at 13 that you had at 5, or the same values at 20 that you had at 13 (but wait, they said 13 was old enough to dedicate your life to God)? Has your understanding and appreciation for life grown or lessened as you have gained greater experience over the years? - Is it not often true that the “only” boy in a girl’s life when she is 16 or 17 years old (17! You better have been baptized by then or you’re an outcast!) is long forgotten as she grows to womanhood and attaches greater importance to a man’s godly traits and personality?” -11/1/1985 page.2

Is a life-long dedication to God not a  much more important decision? You know in the Bible there is not one example of youth baptism. In fact, Jesus himself wasn’t baptized until he was 30 years old! So why hurry young ones to get baptized so young, why not wait until they are fully adults that can clearly understand the decision? As Witnesses we are raised in a closed environment, only allowed to associate with other witnesses, so how could we be prepared for such a decision only knowing one side of the story? “Probably your religion was decided for you by your place of birth, over which you had no control. Surely, nothing is lost by examining what the Bible says about God.” – Mankind’s Search for God page 378. I remember the (elder and pioneer family who had one child become a stripper and go to jail, the other is out) children getting baptized way young, and being told that they were the examples that I should follow, how did that work out for them?

So why then do they ignore the Bible’s advice and their own on maturity when baptizing teenagers and preteens, some as young as 9 and 10 years old? Could it be that they realize that it’s a way to ‘lock them in’, knowing that if they ever leave that their friends and yes even families will be held hostage to them?

And now is it any surprise that in my 30’s I too have made my own informed decision for my life? Do you really think that I made this decision on a whim and based on emotions, rather than researching and thinking deeply about the subject before possibly throwing my life away? I think you know me better than that, need I remind you: http://www.mypersonality.info/miahx/

I love you and dad, and I hope you take the time to think about all of this before rendering judgment on me as an “apostate”. I really don’t want to take your hope away from you or any of our family. I just want to be able to have a normal family life with both sides realizing that we don’t agree on this subject, we don’t have to talk about it.

Love,

Your Son Jeremy

Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blind-folded fear." – Thomas Jefferson

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

I found your experience and read this.  I hate the word apostate.  For me thats someone who lies and tears things down by whatever means.  Im not like that.  I just want the truth.  If I hear lies about JW's I will highlight it.  Im not here to hurt anyone, I just want all the answers.  I just want the truth.  Im no apostate.  I never will be.

Actually, an apostate is someone who who leaves their past religion behind. Even Jesus was an apostate when he left the Jewish religion..

And from the organization's point of view "Persons who deliberately spread (stubbornly hold to and speak about) teachings contrary to Bible truth as taught by Jehovah's Witnesses are apostates." - Pay Attention to Yourself and to All the Flock

We are all pretty much apostates in their eyes.

The link provided above is quite telling on the subject.

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

I liked your comment, because it made me think.  Yes Jesus was an apostate from the viewpoint of Judaism.  (Yet he had to didn't he?)  However, it would be hypocritical of me to search for 'truth' and let lies pollute that.  That won't work for me.  Im looking out my kitchen window and feel that it's all just hopeless.  How could I ever even begin to undo 24 years of this?  How do I even begin?  Where will my life lead me from here? 

It would be easier to go back.  I could walk straight back into the k/hall and resume my life.  I haven't broken any laws/rules.  At most I may be asked to study with a sister to help me get back on track spiritually.

But I cant even do that.  Not now.  My conscience won't let me. 

Do you have a vendetta against the witnesses?  I think I still protect them a little.   That frightens me because the grip has loosened, but it still there.

Im rambling on, sorry.

 

 

I will answer your questions to me personally in this thread since it's about me, lol. I will answer your other questions/concerns in your thread.

 

No, I do not have a vendetta against the sheep at all, they are caught up in a lie like we were once. I love them as I did before, and the whole purpose of this site is to help them too see through the lies. I spent much of my life lying to others, or as JWs call it 'boldly preaching the truth'. Now I will continue to boldly promote the truth, except the real truth. I only wish someone had told me sooner, so much life wasted for nothing.

As for the bOrganization's Governing Body, that's another story. I used to wonder if they too were confused by their own BS. But the more I have looked for the answer to that question, the more obvious it has become that some of them know they are doing this on purpose. This image of the reasoning book picking and choosing information to meet their viewpoint is a great example. And there's many examples on the evolution subject where they do this. And they would have to, because evolution is so easily provable as fact.

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

thanks for maintaining the website, glad to be back!

Thanks. Glad to have ya back Leah!

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

Love it...

 

Why would Satan, a perfect being who saw first-hand the awesome power of God, decide to challenge him. What did this genius think would happen next?

 

well said!

I just found out my mom has stage 4 cancer and has around a year to live...

I think she is best left alone believing that there is something more after death.

 

4/29 UPDATE:

Thanks to my sister working on her, my mom finally agreed to talk to me. Even better my sister explained to her how she won't get anywhere if she just treats me like I'm unworthy, which is how she has treated us both all along about leaving the JWs.

My dad answered the phone, but as usual it only took a few sentences before he passed it over to the head of the children.

I asked about the cancer first, she explained it is some kind of estrogen-based cancer? But as she went into the details of how bad it is I broke down pretty hard, didn't expect that at all. Oddly, she acts so nonchalant about it, almost emotionless (my sister said that's how she acted to her about it too). I don't know if that's how someone told her to talk to others about it or what, but it's very off.

She told me that her doctor said that the cancer was spreading extremely quickly and that it was stress-related somehow. She's already had high blood pressure for years. But she then went on to blame that stress on her kids leaving the JWs, basically blaming us which I didn't appreciate. But I do know she has been way freaked out having all 4 of her kids out (youngest brother is DFed now, though still believes). She still believes that I am to blame for my sister going out.

Her big hangup is that she had found me talking against the religion on Richard Dawkins forum, claiming she stumbled on it by accident (yeah right, I used a username, not my real name). What I said there was like the first anything I posted on the net about it as I was just coming out and was so innocent (non-apostate, if you will). Good thing she doesn't know about this place!!! It would really hurt her to know that the pain of losing them was inspired me to create it in the first place...since we're throwing blame around.

I had congratulated my dad on finally becoming an elder, and then went on to mention that the newest elder's handbook says that talking to DFed ones is on longer a DFing offense. She of course gasped that I knew that. She brought up about me making my pledge to Jehovah when I got baptized, I explained that Jesus was 30+ when he got dunked, I was only like 16. Certainly you can't think I knew everything then that I do now as an adult.

I used a new line of reasoning with her, which is simply what if I didn't want to live in the new system? An 80yr old elder/special pioneer used to always say in his no-hellfire spiel that 'why would God burn someone forever who never even asked to be born just because they don't want to live? God wouldn't hate that person, so he would just let him go back to sleep forever.' So why can't she just accept that about me, and enjoy her son while she has me. She said 'why would I want to spend time with you and love you when I know you're just going to die?' I quipped 'why would I want to spend the next year loving you when I know you are just going to die?'. Silly reasoning.

She went on to belittle "what kind of trash have you two been looking at to not believe anymore, it can't be anything. I said 'I can't tell you because I don't want to take your hope away, and you just call me an apostate whenever I have tried to say anything in the past. Why would I want to take your hope away now when I know you are dying? Why can't we just love each other for the time we have left and agree to disagree,

The call lasted over an hour, lost track of time beyond that. All in all there was no arguing, a few small debates mainly, but she had a calm motherly non-confrontational tone throughout the conversation, which was nice.

Before she got off the phone she said the phone was open anytime. So this means I have my foot in the door at least a little. I waited to see if she would say she loved me first before hanging up, and she did.

My sis plans to call her today (acting as though she doesn't know we talked yet) to see what she will say about it. I am also having my sis recommend the anti-depressant pills I started taking when they stopped talking to me to help her with the stress.

She got some kind of Rife machine to try to slow it, anyone know anything about them? My mom is easily drug into fringe stuff like magnetic bracelets, colloidal silver, and some machine that supposedly sucks bad stuff out of your feet, so I am skeptical of it.

I'll try to keep y'all posted from here.

 

EDIT TO ADD:

I forgot to mention one funny thing that she said to me and my sister; she asked if we couldn't just go back to being a JW even though we don't believe it just to make her happy til she dies. No chance of that happening of course, so sad that she is that desperate to have us back in though. Love can make you crazy at times I guess.

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

Wow...I can't imagine what it must be like to have that kind of an experience, but I'm probably about to find out.  I'm a "fader", having left the organization of my own accord (not DF'ed) about two and a half years ago.  After serving as a ministerial servant for 7 years and and elder for 10, that was a move that shocked a lot of people.  That is, I was a "fader" until yesterday.

 

Yesterday, I went public, talking about the subject of indoctrination on this episode of my podcast.  I have no idea how my parents, my dad with over 60 years in "the truth" and my mom at about 40 years, are going to handle this.  Because I know they're going to find out; y'all know how quickly the JW rumor mill turns.  I haven't decided if I should warn them or just let them find out and see how they react.

 

Tinysadpanda, if you go back, make sure it's because you really believe it, not just for the sake of "getting your life back".  After all, if you're living a lie, what kind of a life is it really going to be?

 

I'm glad I found this place.  Jeremy, thank you for making this site and for your openness.  It's only by this kind of open dialogue, out in the public eye, that we can ever hope to put enough pressure on the organization for them to stop the emotional blackmail of disfellowshipping and loosen the stranglehold they have on our families.

 

I look forward to getting to know all of you!

 

Jerry

P.S. I love this quote from John F. Kennedy, which I found in Ray Franz's book "Crisis of Conscience":

 

"The great enemy of truth is very often not the lie--deliberate, contrived and dishonest--but the myth--persistent, persuasive and unrealistic. Too often we hold fast to the cliches of our forebears. We subject all facts to a prefabricated set of interpretations. We enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought."

Glad to have you Jerry, and thanks for the kind words.

Please do post an intro here with your story, it will encourage many.

As for your situation, I don't think it matters how they found out, if they do at all. But I wouldn't bet a lot of JWs would be listening to that podcast, so I would not worry about it too much.

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

Thanks Jeremy...I will be sharing "the story" in short order.

Latest email from my mom:

"Hello, Hope you are doing okay after the terrible storms you had.  Did it flood your pool?  Of course I have missed you too, what has happened can't be undone.  The pain never goes away, but I know we can never see eye to eye on the things closest to our hearts.

Right now, I am feeling well healthwise, at times I doubt myself, but I am doing all that I can to get rid of this thing.  Eating things I never would have before.  If I fail, I am secure in my hope and am not afraid.  I will die with regrets, but I know the decisions I made were good ones.  I can't control the ones I can't change regarding those I love dearly.

I am sorry the decisions you have made affected the relations I treasured, but don't beat yourself up, as I am not, all of life's choices bring us consequences, ones that can make us happy or sad.

Just know as my son, I love you, I just can't live with your choices.  I have to live with the thought of never seeing or enjoying your company throughout eternity.  A hard pill to swallow.      Love,  Mom"

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

And my reply:

 

Dear Mom and Dad,

So I heard that Jody decided to pay you all a visit after 20 years of wanting nothing to do with you. It's a shame that he only came with two purposes; 1) to show you the soon-to-be grandson spawn that you will never get to see, and 2) to attempt to hurt me by telling you about my website TheBroadRoad.com. Such a good person, the prodigal son returns!

So what you got wrong is thinking that I wanted to take your faith from you, even after I told you I didn’t, especially after I learned that you were dying of cancer. I asked if we could both agree to disagree and just not talk about it and have some semblance of a normal relationship. Since you know about my website now, you can read the full post about us here where I clearly said “She went on to belittle "what kind of trash have you two been looking at to not believe anymore, it can't be anything. I said 'I can't tell you because I don't want to take your hope away, and you just call me an apostate whenever I have tried to say anything in the past. Why would I want to take your hope away now when I know you are dying? Why can't we just love each other for the time we have left and agree to disagree,”

I also heard that the video about Sparlock turned out to be the real deal, made by the organization. The good news is that it turned Sparlock The Warrior Wizard into an internet sensation, just Google him! There’s also been a lot of press about the governing body losing a lawsuit for hiding the sexual abuse of its members from law enforcement, as I’m sure you’ve heard.

Anyhow as I can read from your email below and from what sis tells me that was the last straw, that you want nothing to do with me anymore. But don't make that decision just yet, at least let me have my final word on the subject here first.

Here's the thing, I am not demonized. I know that's hard to grasp at this point but let it sink in. Here's proof: SATAN AND HIS DEMONS, GET AWAY FROM ME IN THE NAME OF JEHOVAH! I LOVE JEHOVAH AND HATE SATAN THE DEVIL! See, nothing happened...

You see the Jehovah’s Witness borganization is successful at baptizing people very young so that they can hold their families hostage if they ever want to leave it. Then they demonize these people with the word ‘apostate’ to make sure that people are even afraid of them. They use emotional blackmail even to the ones they do talk to. They also demonize science and logical thinking, just like college, because an overeducated sheep will find out the real truth about the lie.  From their own words “Persons who deliberately spread (stubbornly hold to and speak about) teachings contrary to Bible truth as taught by Jehovah's Witnesses are apostates.” - Pay Attention to Yourself and to All the Flock. You see, you are following MEN, the Governing body, NOT the Bible. Jesus taught to love even your enemy.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: If anyone tells you that you shouldn't look at opposing information to theirs, something is wrong. The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny. Why would anyone who had the real truth be afraid of any information?

You know you helped me build TheBroadRoad.com, part of the inspiration came in how you decided to treat your own son like less of a human being 2+ years ago. I want to help others just like I did as a JW, except now to save them from a life of pain and emotional blackmail. But I’ll make you a deal, since you have the REAL truth that can stand up to any scrutiny, why don’t you help me now? Tell you what, here are the articles that I wrote, go through them one by one, and each one that you can disprove I will take off the website, helping you and others who might stumble upon it. You can even get the help of your favorite elders and such. That’s a better use of your time then knocking on doors, right?

So back to the part where you want nothing to do with me anymore. You don’t have to worry, because I have finally given up on you. Just know that as my parents, I love you, I just can't live with your choice to be in a cult anymore, and I can’t continue holding on only to be treated like less of a human being simply because I don’t believe the same as you. So I am disfellowshipping YOU! I don’t want anything to do with you until you leave that cult.

I have new family now, lots of them, who love me unconditionally. Many of them are even ex-elders and ex-bethelites, imagine that. So don’t worry about me, I will be just fine without you.

Love,

Jeremy

P.S. It could have been worse, I could have treated you like JWs want exJWs to be treated:

True Christians share Jehovah's feelings toward such apostates; they are not curious about apostate ideas. On the contrary, they "feel a loathing" toward those who have made themselves God's enemies, but they leave it to Jehovah to execute vengeance.” - The Watchtower 1993 November 1 page 1

some of the apostate literature presents falsehoods by means of "smooth talk" and "counterfeit words." What would you expect from the table of demons?...Those who have continued to feed at Satan's spiritual table, the table of demons, will be forced to attend a literal meal, no, not as partakers, but as the main course-to their destruction!” - The Watchtower 1994 July 1 page 12

We must hate in the truest sense, which is to regard with extreme and active aversion, to consider as loathsome, odious, filthy, to detest.” - The Watchtower 1952 October 1 page 599

apostates are 'mentally diseased', and they seek to infect others with their disloyal teachings. - We do not receive them into our homes or greet them. We also refuse to read their literature, watch TV programs that feature them, examine their Web sites, or add our comments to their blogs. Why do we take such a firm stand? Because of love.” - The Watchtower July 15, 2011 p. 16

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

Jeremy, your letter reflects the harsh reality of the WTS teachings and policies. I hope it will make your parents at least think!

Hi Jeremy,

as a newbie to this site, I just wanted to say thanks for setting up this site and for sharing with us, not only your story, but the correspondence between you and your JW mother.

It never ceases to amaze me how stubborn and steadfast those family members, who are still in the organisation, are. It seems to me that no matter how much you reason with them, how much you point them in the direction of the society's own publications, to discredit their 'truth', how they still refuse to listen. The organisation sure has done a job on them. They're convinced that whatever we say, no matter how logical or how straight forward things are put to them, that we are all things evil, serving Satan and mentally diseased.

I am sorry for you and others like you that through this process of turning your back on the organisation and moving on with your lives, you have had to endure the pain and suffering of losing and being cut off from your loved ones.

I, at least can say, that this has not happened to me, as I was the only one from my family who became a JW. With regards to the whole shunning thing, yes, I've been shunned but not by family members and the ones that I once shared my life with, the ones I once had a close friendship with, they are no longer in my life. If my thinking for myself and leaving the so called 'Truth' has earned me their disdain and hatred, well so be it. For me, it is of no real consequence, they are not my family and I can live with their disapproval and their thinking that I am a vile, unrepentant individual but for those of you that are having to deal with this coming from your family members, I can see how heartbreaking this is for you all.

Hoping to get to know not only you but all of you that have joined this wonderful site!Laughing

Liz x

Thank you for your very kind words Liz, very much.I look forward to getting to know you more as well. :)

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

Hi Jeremy, Liz and all the others,

I'm excited to find you all and look forward to candid and comforting conversations with you.  I'm a 'fader' too.  I was baptized back in 1977 and was raised by a family of JW's. The hypocrisy and double standards within my own family and also in the various congregations we were in had me questioning things all my life, but determined to 'do the right thing' I persisted and on and off became active then inactive until I finally felt free of the teachings which had controlled my mind and heart all my life.  Recently my husband, who was only baptized five years ago, started fading too realizing the double standards, lies and so forth that can be seen in both our local congregation and in the organization world wide.  I too favour Athiesm/Agnostism although certain other theories about energy in the universe being impersonal yet reactional with our thoughts and lives also appeal to me.  I hope to find you all on line soon.

Notsoignorant

Hey Jeremy. It seems I may have met the parallel universe of myself. Your letters to your mother are all too familiar to me. Mine too has been diagnosed with a similar type of cancer (ovarian/uterus). It makes talking and reasoning with them quite tricky. You want to defend yourself and enlighten them, but at the same time, you're guilt ridden with destroying their hope for the future. I think all of us here, no matter how far-fetched it seems to us now, once believed and yearned for the new system. Coming to the realization it's all a paradoxical myth, and there's no big-guy in the sky, it can be hard , even if we don't confront it right away.

Anyway, short on time at the moment. Just wanted to say thanks for co-creating this site, and telling your story so thoroughly.

I'm sorry to hear we have this in common Jimmy, this cult sucks. :(

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

On August 24th 2013 my mom died from the cancer at the age of 64. I feel like she died twice.

The real truth will stand up to any scrutiny.

I'm very sorry to hear about your mom, Jeremy. Not sure of what to say, so I'll just say that my thoughts are with you. Wishing you peace.

~Rhonda