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Intro

Hello peeps! Super stoked this site exists!!! I’ve never been on one b4.

I've been looking at a text I rc'd earlier today and thinking... This text is from an elder in local cong, "Please text me your August field service reports as soon as possible. Thanks." 

October 1st will be 2 yrs ago that I was finally baptized... Haven’t turned in my time regularly since.

Inactive.

I was raised in "the truth" and think I’ve seen and researched it all lmbo… wheeew and ughhh!!!!!!!!

But here’s some of my info:

My mom was a very zealous single reg pio of 4 children. I was the bad influence sibling; the free thinker. For example, I found it unlikely that a perfect Eve would've been thoroughly deceived by a random talking snake, however my sense of loyalty, need for acceptance and basic care suppressed pursuing independence or deviating from the flock, at the time. I experienced the epic mind f*ck (EMF) of believing "the truth" and leaving the truth a number of times. Not doing it again.

I excelled academically, however higher education was frowned upon and I was removed from H.S. and home-schooled. I still resent that. 

I wasn’t disrespectful but I continued to be a free thinker, so my mom disowned me at 18 even though I wasn’t baptized. She proposed my entire non-JW fleshly family disown me as well. I lost touch with my brother and sisters and as a result I was unable to form further bonds. I suppose I may have influenced them after all, as they are all atheists/agnostic now. Due to loss of ties, time, location, and “life”, unfortunately we don’t communicate often. I believe that scars have formed a disinterest in reuniting, on any substantial level. Needless to say, it’s been unimaginable having no “real” support system for the majority of my life (hence, recent feeble attempt at baptism).  

Side Note: To be fair - there are a lot of psychologically unhealthy people in and out of religious organizations… And non-religious, for that matter.

At one point when I was in the witness frame of mind, I didn’t want to fault my Father, the UNIVERSAL SOVEREIGN, for human error… If he existed. I wanted SO desperately for “the truth” to be correct no matter how delusional it was… Refer back to earlier comment on EMF.

I’ve met some amazing people here and there… But for me, there always seems to be a void in fully connecting with people who haven’t had the JW experience, it’s just not the same. I figure we have a few years of life left and it’d be great to IM, meet up, call, Skype, or what evs with other intelligent like-minded peeps.

Future forums: You may find me on one day full of sarcasm and comedy, the next angst and resentment and another day strictly scientific. Either way, I’m very glad we have this resource!!!! Hit me up dataminions *-*

 

At last, some activity........there doesn't seem to be a lot of it these days on here. Good to see you.

I can't helped but get stirred up whenever I read someone else's story which hit's so close to home. It's difficult isn't it. It's a very unique psychological affliction that most people in the world won't understand, and/or even care about. I too have lost contact with my parents and a number of siblings. Although I'm super grateful for the ones I still have in my life, there's always a sense of complete self-reliance, and a lack of support. I just remind myself to never play the victim, and continue to grow and heal from a rough start. It may be true; it's hard to connect to someone who isn't an ex-jw the same way as a "normal" person...but the further you're removed from it, the less it is a part of your identity. Hope all is well Feferi, welcome to the forum. :)