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Hey all! Nerd here. :)

Hello! I'm Josh. *waves awkwardly*

I grew up with a JW family, but the doctrine never sat well with me. Too much stuff didn't make logical sense. I tried really hard, too, but I never could make myself go along with it completely. So, of course, I had lots of meetings with elders about my progress and having more zeal and whatever. It drove me nuts that any logical problem I found with the doctrine was dismissed or conveniently circumvented with some weird reasoning. I hated bothering people out in service and I was so tired of hearing the same BS over and over in the meetings. But I put on a good show... What else was I going to do? I had nowhere to go... Everyone I knew was part of the organization... Besides, I already had plenty of practice keeping up a pretense being that I'm gay...

About 4 years ago (I'm 28 now)  I made an awesome friend online. He gave me the support I needed to voice everything I had kept secret my whole life. All my doubts, my worries, my secrets, everything... He then helped arrange a place for me to stay in Colorado. I sold or gave away everything except for my clothes and my computer, then bought a plane ticket. My family didn't really know what to say as I never gave them any indication I planned to leave the state. I just had to get away, and I didn't want to give them the chance to guilt me out of it. So I said my goodbye to everything and everyone I had ever known and started over here in Colorado. It was both the most exciting and the most terrifying thing I had ever done.

I'm an atheist now, attending college and learning about biology. (*GASP* BUT EVOLUTION IS EVIL, RIGHT!?) It's been rough, but my friend has always been there for me. My family doesn't know that I've abandoned the religion yet, but I know it is only a matter of time until it is found out. Eventually it will be announced at a meeting and that will be the final break between us. I'm happy to have finally escaped that crazy cult, but I wish I could have taken my family with me...

Hey, is anybody here? Helloooooo? *listens for echo*